The day started with the sound of a shower. Light was coming through the half closed blinds and I kept my body as still and quiet as I possibly could for as long as I could – breathing and staring. I put plans out of my mind and held on to the silence. When I walked out of the room, smiles greeted me and I felt a rush of excitement move through my limbs. It was starting – the busyness of the day, the anticipation, it was beginning and all I could do was breath.
To do lists were read aloud, phones were ringing. We brunched, strolled around a farmers market filled with fresh fruits and spices, we gossiped about previous events, spoke softly and loudly unable to contain the excitement, and then headed home to prepare for preparations.
Everyone always says, “don’t forget to eat,” but that was the last thing on my mind. As we started putting on make-up and curling hair I kept looking around at all the faces, my heart full of love and camaraderie. Things picked up as people started coming and going, in and out of my family’s home. The whole while I felt my heart stay at it’s steady, warm, filled-to-the-brim rate.
Eventually we all climbed into various cars, me in my own, alone to breath and drive down familiar roads and curves. The blur happened between the time we arrived at the venue to the time I reached my arm through my dad’s, getting ready to walk down the windy path.
We walked and laughed and squeezed each other. My steady heart started to speed up as we rounded the corner and I saw my grandmas being walked down the grassy aisle by two of my best friends. I saw family, sitting and waiting, my best friends lined up, facing me, and his back was turned, waiting for the nod. I hadn’t seen his face all day and my heart rate sped even more.
The song that was playing has been played an immeasurable amount of times through my car speakers, always bringing me to tears when Justin Vernon sings the words, “and at once I knew I was not magnificent.” In a sense it brings me to my knees, putting me in my place in the vast awe-some world around me. On that day something similar happened and as those words were sung, he turned around with a shaky face and locked eyes with mine. In that moment and the moments that followed we were sent to our knees, put in our place – fully knowing what it means to enter into a love that is beyond any one person. It is greater and awe-inspiring, it is deeper than one can know and it is a hard, selfless place. In those moments, while reminders of the purpose of coming together as one and the significance and beauty of it were being spoken, I truly felt as if I was laying down myself to become a part of something that is utterly human and incredibly supernatural – the magnificence of love and my small part in it.
The celebration that followed was almost as indescribable. We danced, hugged, laughed, ate, and just lived in those moments – how everyone should live in all moments – in the midst of strong love and with our people gathered around close.
This story is for my friends and family and my husband. I love you all so, so deeply. This day would not have been so good without you there with us, dancing and laughing and sweating.
Eric, these past few years that we’ve spent together have been the best years of my life. You are good to everyone around you and you love so well. You are talented and strong and the years we have ahead of us are going to give us the most incredible memories. I can’t wait. I love you with everything in me. Happy married life, babe.
Photos by Mikaela Hamilton Photography
OUR DAY
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